How to Cope with Unemployment and Rebuild Your Self-Worth

When I was laid off from my role as an editor for a magazine in late 2024, I tried to remind myself of the obvious: Don’t tie your self-worth to a job. It’s just a job. But on the days I spent scooping up dirty towels from gym members to make ends meet, hope felt distant. For months, money was tight, and some mornings, there was little reason to get out of bed. I barely felt human.

According to Aja Evans, a New York City-based financial therapist and author of Feel Good Finance, this experience is far from unique. She tells Vox that unemployment or underemployment often leads to deep self-doubt because “we base a lot of our identity on what we do.” In fact, a 2023 Pew Research poll found that about 4 in 10 Americans who aren’t self-employed view their careers as a crucial part of their identity. When that identity is stripped away, how we see ourselves—and how we present ourselves to others—can feel distorted.

Society often prioritizes financial success over other qualities, like kindness or adventure. Without a job, the contrast can be jarring. Budget constraints may force you to decline social invitations, postpone trips, or skip events you’ve been looking forward to. These necessary cutbacks, while practical, can deepen feelings of isolation.

If this resonates with you, you’re not alone. Layoffs are widespread across industries, and many people are struggling right now. Here’s advice from those who’ve been through it—or are still navigating it.

Allow Yourself to Grieve the Loss

Domenica Davis, 47, had an inkling layoffs were coming, but the news still hit hard. As a national broadcast TV meteorologist, she recalls,

“It was shocking. I thought, Oh my god. What am I going to do?”

Felicia Penza faced a similar shock in 2010. At 30, pregnant with twins, she was preparing to move from Scottsdale, Arizona, to Los Angeles when she was unexpectedly let go from her graphic design job.

“Getting laid off is devastating,”

“It’s like an unexpected breakup in a relationship meant to endure, to last.”

Experts agree: suppressing these emotions only prolongs the pain. Instead, take time to process the loss of your job—and the life it supported.

Reevaluate Your Identity Beyond Work

Evans emphasizes that while careers shape our routines and social circles, they don’t define our worth.

“There’s obviously a lot more to any human than their job status,”

• Reflect on your values: What qualities matter most to you—creativity, resilience, community?
• Explore new roles: Volunteer, freelance, or take on part-time work to regain structure and purpose.
• Reconnect with hobbies: Revisit passions you set aside during your career. Painting, hiking, or writing can restore joy.

Practical Steps to Regain Stability

Financial stress amplifies emotional turmoil. To ease the burden:

• Audit your budget: Cut non-essentials and prioritize needs like rent, groceries, and healthcare.
• Leverage resources: Use unemployment benefits, food banks, or community programs for support.
• Network strategically: Reach out to former colleagues, attend industry events, or join online groups for job leads.

These steps won’t erase the pain of unemployment, but they can create a foundation for moving forward.

You’re Not Alone in This

Layoffs are a shared experience, even if it feels isolating. Whether you’re navigating underemployment, financial strain, or identity shifts, remember: your value isn’t tied to a paycheck. As Evans puts it,

“We really do base a lot of our identity on what we do,”