Putin’s 2026 Victory Day Parade Mocked as 'Pathetic Spectacle' After Zelensky’s Troll Move

Russian President Vladimir Putin at the Victory Day parade in Moscow’s Red Square on May 9, 2026. (Photo by Pavel Bednyakov / Pool / AFP via Getty Images)

There was a Soviet joke back in the 1970s in which a tank driver on a military base gets a tempting offer from a black-market dealer to sell his tank. Hesitant because the May 9 Victory Day parade is approaching, the dealer suggests making a cardboard tank and walking in the parade while making vroom vroom noises. The tank driver agrees. When the big day arrives, he sees the parade grounds filled with cardboard tanks, drivers doing vroom vroom, pilots carrying cardboard planes, and making airplane noises.

That joke came to mind recently as reports emerged of Russia’s 2026 Victory Day parades dropping customary displays of heavy weaponry. Instead, videos showed kindergartners in various Russian cities marching with cardboard and plastic tanks, fighter planes, and artillery. The event was widely mocked as a “parade of shame,” a “pathetic spectacle,” or a “nightmare on Red Square” by Ukrainian, Russian expatriate, and opposition media.

Putin’s Ceasefire Request and Zelensky’s Trolling

Before the parade, Vladimir Putin, reportedly spooked by the prospect of Ukrainian drones disrupting the event, asked Donald Trump to negotiate a Victory Day ceasefire. Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky, known for his comedic background, responded with a mocking executive order permitting the May 9 parade to be held “in the city of Moscow (Russian Federation)” for “humanitarian purposes outlined during negotiations with the American side.” Zelensky even added the precise coordinates of the spot exempted from Ukrainian strikes.

Ukrainian comedian and social media personality Yuri Velikiy amplified the trolling by posting a clip showing Putin nervously conferring with Belarusian President Alexander Lukashenko during the parade, waiting for Zelensky’s permission to go to the bathroom.

Russian War Bloggers React with Fury

Russian war-hawk bloggers responded to Zelensky’s stunt with outrage. Some called for strikes on Kyiv in retaliation, while others expressed thinly veiled contempt for Putin. Many described Zelensky’s move as rubbing Putin’s face in it or reducing him to a terpila—a slang term for a perpetual victim enduring humiliation.

A Muted Parade and Putin’s Defiant Speech

The parade itself was described as “muted” and “subdued.” Armored vehicles and intercontinental ballistic missiles were displayed only on video. The event lasted less than an hour, with Putin surrounded by visible security and wearing a bulky black coat that may have included a bulletproof vest. He was briskly ushered in and out of the venue.

In his speech, Putin struck a defiant tone, declaring that Russian soldiers in Ukraine “face an aggressive force that is armed and supported by the entire bloc of NATO” but are fighting on nonetheless. He concluded by stating that “victory has always been and will