Oregon Appeals Court Rules Gaslighting Alone Does Not Constitute Child Custody Abuse

The Oregon Court of Appeals, in a unanimous decision by Judges Ramón Pagán, Robyn Aoyagi, and Jacqueline Kamins, reversed a trial court’s ruling in Estens v. Wells that had modified sole child custody to the father based on allegations of 'gaslighting.' The appellate court clarified that gaslighting, while harmful, does not legally qualify as 'abuse' under Oregon’s child custody statutes.

The case stemmed from a custody dispute between parents, where the trial court had cited the mother’s alleged dishonesty and evasiveness as grounds for modifying custody. Witnesses testified that the mother had taken the child on a vacation to Hawaii and falsely claimed to the father that she had been 'bumped' from her flight, resulting in a delayed return. The mother’s boyfriend contradicted her account, stating she had not been bumped. Additionally, the mother was found to be evasive about the child’s medical care, initially denying but later admitting to canceling or skipping appointments.

Text messages between the parents were also cited, with the mother exaggerating the number of times the child attended a particular extracurricular activity in an apparent effort to secure financial support from the father.

The trial court had ruled that the mother’s behavior constituted 'abuse' under Oregon Revised Statutes (ORS) 107.137, stating:

“Another factor that I may have skipped over is the abuse of one parent by the other. There has been no allegation of abuse. However, I find that Mother's communication with Father and the testimony amounts to a lot of gaslighting. It's a moving target, the truth with Mother's testimony has been a moving target. 'Didn't you say this?' 'Oh, yes, but I meant this.' There's six different explanations for everything. And it is not good for the child and it does constitute abuse, gaslighting is abuse. And so that is another factor that the Court is considering.”

The trial court ultimately found the mother not credible and the father credible, modifying sole custody to the father. However, the Oregon Court of Appeals reversed this decision, concluding that the conduct described as 'gaslighting' does not meet the legal definition of 'abuse' under ORS 107.137.

Legal Definition of Abuse in Custody Cases

The appellate court emphasized that Oregon law requires courts to consider multiple factors when determining child custody, including whether one parent has committed abuse as defined in ORS 107.705. If abuse is found under this statute, there is a rebuttable presumption that custody should not be awarded to the abusive parent. However, the court noted that ORS 107.137 does not define 'abuse' and that the trial court’s interpretation of gaslighting as abuse was incorrect.

The appeals court ruled that the mother’s conduct, while potentially harmful to the co-parenting relationship, did not rise to the level of abuse as defined by state law. The decision underscores the importance of adhering to statutory definitions in custody determinations.